the Monster came back the other night, and it stayed for two days.
the Monster lives inside of me and works in painful ways.
why, i ask, did the Monster choose me?
when all i ask for is peace and serenity.
i guess because the Monster sees, a child who owes it overdue fees.
my home is now within a glass house, so the Monster hunts me like i’m the scared mouse.
no where to run.
no where to hide.
the Monster will chase me and eat me alive.
what is this monster doing to my brain? anxiety is bad, but this is insane.
so I try to tell those in my life and explain to them this never-ending strife.
that’s cuts into my spirit, just like a knife.
but all that comes out
are unsure trembles,
and a ghost of what i used to resemble.
the Monster tricked me
for 25 years…
it promised me safety, happiness and cheer.
but all those promises turned into tears, and now I am left locked into fear.
so i try to place the blame on others
but deep inside me i know it’s not you.
it’s not him.
so Monster, Monster, come out and play,
i’m ready to face you
since you’re here to stay.